Jaye Wells

Torturing Your Spouse for Fun

Yesterday, I had what is probably one of my most brilliant ideas ever.

Spouses need to conduct yearly performance reviews.

Take a minute and let the genius of that sink in. Go ahead, I’ll wait.

Okay, you with me?

Here’s the deal, most of us have probably had jobs where some sort of performance review was part of the job. They kind of suck, right? But I think it could actually be fun. A good way to open communication and make sure everyone is on the same page. Plus you can set couple goals, like spending more time together, traveling, etc.

I came up with a sample template for a spousal review, but I don’t know how too upload it to blogger. What I can tell you is that when I shared it with Mr. Jaye, I got the following reaction:

“What’s up with all the yucky communication stuff?”

Okay, so maybe it needs some tweaking. I promised him he could add his own criteria, but he said he was too busy with actual work. I told him that was okay because we both knew his only criteria involved sex and sports. He corrected me and told me the sports thing wasn’t such a big deal. He did request that beer be worked in somewhere.

In all honesty, I’m not sure I will ever convince Mr. Jaye to take part in this experiment. In fact, as we discussed it, I could already smell his fear. I need to stop torturing the poor man, but damn if it isn’t fun.

The spousal review: Helper of marriages? Or potential mine field? You decide.

8 Thoughts on “Torturing Your Spouse for Fun

  1. BRILLIANT! It’s not quite kosher yet to use it on my 2-month old ‘person of interest,’ but I will think of it for the future!

  2. jason evans on December 12, 2006 at 7:19 am said:

    Jaye, indeed you are a genius. I’m all for it.

    I do wonder how many relationships could stand the light of day, however.

  3. Bailey Stewart on December 12, 2006 at 8:51 am said:

    Oooh, sounds like a minefield to me. That’s what makes it fun.

  4. Jana DeLeon on December 12, 2006 at 12:06 pm said:

    I LOVE IT!

  5. I have known a woman who drank too much wine and would begin her evaluation with, “You know, Andy, you can be a real asshole sometimes.”

  6. jamie ford on December 12, 2006 at 2:48 pm said:

    Brilliant. If you could call my wife and explain exactly how brilliant it is I’d appreciate it…

    I’ve jokingly told her that every few years there needs to be an open bid process…various woman could submit proposals, and she, as the incumbent would always be included in said process.

    Seems fair.

    Okay, guess I’m sleeping on the couch again tonight…

  7. Sounds good to me.

    My husband would nod enthusiastically, praise the idea, participate willingly and then forget everything that was said.

    But I gotta give him credit. He tries hard.

  8. Jaye Wells on December 12, 2006 at 6:18 pm said:

    I knew you guys would like this idea. I asked hubby why he didn’t comment on this post since I know he reads the Blahg every day. His response?

    “I wasn’t sure how to type to sound of me screaming in terror.”

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