Today’s Random Topic: Platypus
Did you know that the plural of platypus is both platypi and platypuses?How cool is that? Not only is the animal itself a freaky amalgamation of other animals but it’s one of the one nouns I know of that has your choce of plural endings. Now some pity the platypus. Not I. Imagine being so versatile. You’re a mammal but you can lay eggs. When you swim underwater you can close your eyes and ears; your extremely sensitive beak is all you need to navigate. In my opinion, the platypus is a wonder of evolution. Sure it’s a goofy looking little bastard. But that also adds to its appeal. Plus, don’t be so quick to write our friend off as harmless. I just found out that the male platypus has spurs on its hind legs. With a swift kick he can deliver enough venom from those spurs to kill a dog or make a human sick. So next time yo see a platypus, tip your hat and say “I salute you platypus: goofy but dangerous freak of evolution.”
Gosh, I bet you’re saying to yourself, “Thank heaven I have Jaye’s Blahg. I now have a compendium of useless facts and trivia to use at cocktail parties.” Imagine the impressed looks you’ll at yoru next party when you bust out with platypus factoids. No, no don’t thank me.
OK, things are looking good with the book. Last night I completed my story board. For those of you wondering what this entails I’ll tell you. I take a poster board and divide it into 20 squares (1 per chapter). Then I use large Post Its to write a synposis of each scene from each chapter. So each box may end up with 2 to 4 post its. I also color code the Post Its to indicate the point of view the scene is written in, i.e., pink for the heroine, blue for the hero, and yellow for a subcharacter. But the process isn’t complete until I have driven hubby crazy. “Argh, I hate this scene!” “Get me more Post Its!” “I am starting over-AGAIN.” “Get me a diet coke!” “I hate these characters!” I’m not positive but I think Zach secretly wears ear plugs then when he sees my mouth moving he says some appropriately supportive phrase. “You can do it, honey.” “Yes, dear.” “Uh huh.”
I decided I really, really like to mock my friends. Today’s victim is Kelley. I liked Em’s haiku so much I decided to use is as my trademark mocking tool.
The fruit loop sayer
Hijacking buses is wrong
You fall down a lot
If you’d like to be next, let me know.